Words Unspoken Make the Loudest Sound [Poetry Extract]

What I thought I would do today is head back towards a style of writing I experimented with a couple of weeks ago, in a piece of poetry entitled The Ballad of a Self-Diagnosed Doormat (https://adamdlester17.wordpress.com/2015/05/21/the-ballad-of-a-self-diagnosed-doormat-poetry-extract/). It was basically a more comical approach to topics I often write about, with less imagery and more sarcasm and bluntess. As I felt like doing something different I have gone back to that style of writing for a change and experimented with the source material that inspires me, I hope you all enjoy!

Why should I seek forgiveness from you?

you hold no authority or prestige

I do not bend to your sense of entitlement

you’ll receive no apologies I’m afraid

not until you extend the same courtesy

of course hold a grudge against me for literally anything!

meanwhile I’ll forgive everything you’ve done

consider yourself absolved of all actions

calling me useless and a shit boyfriend

insulting my writing

lying about loving me

removing me from my friends because of jealousy

restricting which gender I speak to

accusing me of cheating on you with a best friend

hitting me repeatedly

breaking the skin on my face

then calling me a coward for  “not taking it like a man”

speaking the words “poor ickle Adam can’t take a hit from a fucking girl”

telling me you hope I die alone

laughing at the thought of my stomach operation going wrong

sending me pictures of your freshly cut skin

lying to me beyond measure

lying to the authorities and threatening everything I have worked for

yes of course all of those are fine!

I did send a thank you card, must have got lost in the post

do you honestly think I need to apologise to you?

what fucking universe do you live in?

when you have addressed the previous points and more

when you remove yourself from your fucking high horse

when you re enter Earth’s atmosphere

then and only then

will I consider listening

it is futile to believe this will ever happen

you will never feel remorse for your actions

I ask why you ever hit me

how you could ever hit someone you claim to love

you will never be able to answer that question

and that in itself is a loud enough answer

blame it on voices in your head

on past traumas from childhood

blame it on anger like a coward

or you could take some responsibility

admit for once that you have problems

either way do not take your anger out on me

do not try to end your life in front of me

do not dare assume I owe you anything

least of all an apology

instead sit in silence

that speaks loud enough for your vile actions

it says more than you will ever be capable of

Thank you all very much for taking the time to read this piece. If you have any thoughts on it then please feel free to leave comments below and I shall respond as soon as I can.

I probably won’t have another piece ready until the start of next week now but I hope you all have a great weekend!

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Poetic Response To James Arthur

This post is inspired by a number of different factors that have influenced my thought patterns this evening. Firstly is the suggestion by a very good friend of mine who suggested that I try posting poetry on to my blog once in a while, which I believe to be a risk worth taking. Second is my own thoughts about poetry; I often write poetry because it’s an incredibly useful means of releasing emotions and feelings but then I never do anything with it, so I might as well give it a go. Thirdly is, as the title suggests, a song that I’ve heard circulating recently entitled ‘You’re nobody til somebody loves you” which is a song that annoys me in so many ways I felt compelled to do something creative with my anger. It is with that I present you with a poem I wrote in response to the song and main idea behind it.

 

“It’s a cold heart when nobody holds you”?

Sounds a little over dramatic doesn’t it James?

You might not mean to sound so reliant on others

But finding company is clearly one of your aims.

 

I urge you to listen to Sawmill Joe singing his famous song

‘I aint nobody’s problem but my own’

It’s a better approach to thinking of how others view you,

Particularly when compared to listening to you moan.

 

You remind me somewhat of my cat who passed away this summer,

Where ever you were she’d what you to be together

Be it outside, inside, in bed or in the bathroom,

Although her closest encounter was with the car that killed her.

 

Now I’ve been single for nearly four years,

Do I feel content in my life? Of course I am

I was taught by Dr Seuss the idea of liking and disliking,

Single is a bit dreary, but it beats green eggs and ham.

 

We always seek comfort in others because it’s natural,

You get lonely sometimes when someone isn’t there

But just because you’re not constantly feeling this comfort

It doesn’t mean people don’t care.

 

I’m single but I would like to think I am somebody,

I make an impact on the people I interact with on a daily basis

If they’re content, neutral or upset

I like to keep a smile across their faces.

 

That’s the sort of person I want to be,

And I know it’s not emotionally rich or exciting

But I like to think that I make an impact on people

Through my actions and my writing.

 

I want to enjoy life and the different experiences

Not sit down at parties and talk about how I’m feeling,

Listen to the music, take off your coat, put your shoes on

And raise your hands to the ceiling.

 

Don’t get offended James but I don’t like the song,

It’s negative and dreary and a honey trap for my generation,

We already get sucked in to the cheesy American ideal of love

Do you really think we need any more persuasion?

 

I would like to think I’m loved by my family and friends,

To be honest I annoy them fifty percent of the time,

But I still feel as though I am someone in this world

Despite not having someone to call ‘mine’

 

Why should I feel that because I’m single I’m a nobody?

I’ve got lungs and I’m still breathing,

And as the White Stripes point out

“I must be fine because my heart’s still beating”

 

James, take life advice from the 84 year old widower

I saw on the tv leaving a hospital

Who says “I’m not happy,

I’m just fed up of being bloody miserable”

 

If you don’t have someone to hold you,

Don’t just sit around and mope,

It’s incredibly boring and unfulfilling

To live a life without hope.

 

There is someone I ultimately like in a romantic way

And it always seems tough from the moment these feelings begin

But it’s your approach to a problem that determine the severity;

The waves seems stronger depending on the boat you’re in.

 

Sad feelings in life don’t have to become common,

Ultimately a problem is only a problem if you let it be one.

 

This is the first poem I’ve posted on here and I can admit it’s not brilliant. I had a fourty five minute gap to write something and this is what I came up with so I know that in terms of rhythm and rhyme it is probably atrocious. Please feel free to leave any comments, be it positive or negative. I’d be interested to see what people think of it.